My Dad

That is my sad affiliation with this man. He is my father. I wish he was not but the universe made it so in spite of me. I use to enjoy his company when I was little. He was fun and I was truly happy. Even though my ignorance created my bliss I enjoyed all that it had to offer. As I got older he became more strict with me. This transition was rough but I felt I handled it alright. But along the way the bullshit my dad has done became more apparent to me and I began to despise him.
He is an analytical, judgmental, bi-polar asshole that will take everything from my past that I have done wrong and use it against me. I do not want him to praise me for what I do right, like I did as a child, but if he could not be an asshole about everything then that would be great too. He yells and gets me upset and then the next minute he is all better. He talks shit about me and instantly he feels better yet I am the one feeling like crap. Sometimes he does praise me but his insults bring me down many more levels then his praise is ever worth. I use to still love him since he is my father. I use to seem him as God and I couldn't say anything ill will toward him. But recent events have drawn my eyes to a new light. My father (excuse the cussing) is a fucking piece of shit that needs to stop getting me angry for his own fucking pleasure just because he gets made for every fucking thing and he tells me I need to get my demons out yet he is the fucking demon messing up my life. He is a fucking piss ant that can fuck off and go to hell. I am done with all the shit that comes with being his son. And whether I go to college, campus, die or whatever. If I am away from him I could careless about what happens in the after life. Because after the experience I have had with this man then I can say that anything is better than his shit. On a side note I swear he wants to fight me when he is mad. If he ever does I am sadden to say that I would fight him back if it ever got to that point. Hatred is a sad thing that can conquer what use to be love & respect.